我的

哪怕就只是影响一个人
就那么一个人
我都是知足的
因为我知道有一天
我会慢慢引导更多需要帮助的人 :)

生命是有影响力的
因为在你的生命里
不只是自己
可是还有身边的人与事

相信美丽的开始，总会有美好的结束
我爱我为人的力量
加油！

Religion

Thank you to all my sisters and the message :)

Religion, to me, it had been an empty shell.

I couldn't recall when. When was the time that i felt, i was empty of soul. I was not empty because i don't have love but i was empty because i do not own a religion.

I've been striving hard for things around me, but not a relationship with any God. I am afraid of commitment first thing, then i am afraid i can't be a good follower. I wasn't taught over a religion apart from bits and bits from education background. Friend was right, i have been an observer.

The words written by Nicky Gumbel were right.

"You and I were created to live in a relationship with God". Until we find that relationship there will always be something missing in our lives, thus we often aware of a gap.

This sentense quoted strikes me. Sometimes, He seems so near and yet so far. Then i realised, it is not about Him, it is me.

I am glad. At least right now, I know where should i head to. At least, i've taken a leap of faith :)

Don't you think so?

Dear Father, enlighten me with your words, guide the new-me to understand your every message behind and i pray to walk through this journey with Your presence.

Happy Birthday, Mummy!

Happy Birthday to my dearest Mummy!

May you be healthy always
be happy always

be joyful always

Thank you for being a great mum throughout the years.

For all the sacrifises that u've made

For all the days and nights u've put up for us

For all the love that u've given

It's simply priceless

You're the greatest woman on earth :)

我爱你 Mummy！:)

a special day for me :)

A week of sugar rush? :)

I would say this is the most special Easter i've ever experienced.

It is special to me because I have made my commitment to God.

It is special because I chose to believe in Him.

It is special because it was my first Easter Sunday as a Christian.

It is special because there are friends around me who've been encouraging.

It is special because my important people were around me during that defining moment and they were so crazy over this decision of mine.

It is important because I will start to grow this relationship with Him :)

I thank God for all.

For all the greatness I've received.

For all the joy i've shared.

and I pray that i'll continue to grow and know You more :)

amen :D

special commitment in life

Im home. Yes, i am. Kluang i mean :)

Sitting in front of the comp, i realised, it's been so long since i sat down quietly at home, to look at this blogger browser, and start my brain engine for a different function.

Had a good chat with a friend today. I am happy to have a heart to heart talk with friends. That's also when i realised, since when i prefer a one-to-one session. I used to be very bubbly in my crowd, although i know i am still do, but, the intensity has reduced. So, we talked about many things today. Direction of life was the main dish of today's topic.

Having a long lasting friendship with someone is never a smooth sailing journey. It needs so much of effort and energy to pay the "maintenance" fee. *well, it's just a metaphor. I mentioned about to have someone to fall back to whenever i have trouble. I realise, each time, when life is challenging, I know i have my support back at home. I know who can i fall back to, i know where to get help, i know who to shout to for tension release purpose :) Each time, i feel blessed because i have friends around. I can't say family is negligible, but due to distance, friends are those i can fall back to.

For me, it is a commitment that i have in life. To me, friendship is a commitment. It's something that we have and we need to make an effort for it. It's a very special relationship. Some people might think it's not as imp as how i look at it but for me, there's just like a backbond in the body. However, I've been neglecting ppl in life due to this hectic schedule. I missed the moments tat my friends needed the most. I wasn't updated about my important friends. I am making a change. I am thinking for a resolution. I am learning to adjust. Give me some times. I am around still, until anyone decides to ask me to go. :)

Thanks for those who always being a support to me. Shan Na is thankful for all of these.

Destigmatising Mental Illness

It's a very fruitful Sunday than sleeping like a log :) Attended a public forum on Destigmatising Mental Illness. Inspiring sharings from various types of people across different fields, from psychiatrics, psychologist, doctor to patients.

Mental health issues have been quite alarming recently in Malaysia. The awareness finally began and professionals are taking endless effort in educating the citizen. It's not something to be ashamed of. Often at times, we only will feel "eeeeeeew, this fella is crazy!" In this forum, we get to understand some misconceptions, whether it's science or non-science factors or how mental illness comes about.

One thing that i must mention in this is, social support from our surrounding is very important. Support group was repetitively and highly emphasized by the professionals. He asked "pls name me 5 of ur best friends in 20secs." No kidding, I can hardly spell my best friends on the paper. Why would I have such hesitation. Doctor was right, he said, we can never have 1 best friend. We need to find more, if not, 1 best friend decides to leave us and we'll be left with nobody and it'll cause depression. Haha! That's kinda true. What we gotta remember is, we're not living for anyone in this world. We're living for ourselves :) Even the whole decides to fall apart, we still have us! :)

What's more, 2 noble mothers took the floor with their experience sharing of the recovery journey from mental illness. Tears were struggling in my eyes, to listen to a single mother raises two children with mental illness all by herself. The tormenting 17 crazy years were shocking. Imagine, it's 17 years and right now, she's standing in front of everyone telling us how proud she is towards her children. So much of courage, so much of patience and preseverance. How wonderful God provided her, to sustain her with energy and strong will with the beliefs of never give up. We can't measure the love that our mother provided to us. We can't ever measure with a yardstick. No. This is called the unconditional love. Surprisingly, mothers never gave up on children that easily as compared to fathers. So many single mum in the forum today.

We never know how blessed we are until we listen to the stories of others and gaining insights from day to day. Together, we shall fight this stigma of mental health. It can be healed with our willing heart :)

right now...

Right now, Project Management & Facilitation Training is on going among the students. It's nice to have students around, to discuss things over, to develop and sharing in certain skills/knowledge. My session was over. I'm here to write something because i realised it's been so long since i enter Scripts of My Life. =(

Guess my self-management isn't really that well after all. Letting out emotions and being detected by people have been apparent lately. Guess it's my "I" personality which is currently playing a role of being emotional and overly hyperactive/optimistic under a stressful situation.

I wish to be better in most of the things i do. I am not excelling anything in everything now. I am trying. Gimme some times :) Nothing special, just want to apologize on those whom i hurt.

Life has been good. God is good. I have most of the things i want in life. I am contented. Just because of being too contented doesn't mean you're good in everything you're in right now. Therefore, i guess it's the time for me to think about the change.